Overwhelmed

The word for today is overwhelmed! With deadlines for school, personal and my professional life are causing me a lot of stress. It also doesn’t help that I keep putting off the challenging thing or labour intensive thing I need to do off. I am very critical of my performance levels, and my efficiency. Like most people the way I am viewed by others is some what important to me. Now it is not all people’s views that matter, but there are a lot. I have to figure out a way that I can deliver what I promise. This is very important to me. So for the next few days I will be caring around a little note pad and writing down problem I find and ideas to fix them.


Something else that is really bugging me and well has for the last month or so are my extreme feelings of loneliness. I know I have family members that I can talk to, but my life is missing that special someone. I really noticed this when I was at the conference. I had an amazing three days, but no one to share it with. My Mom reads this so yes I know you are there for me anytime I need you. And I really do appreciate that. My Mom is the best I love her to death. If I didn’t have to talk to the people at work, I could probably go days with out verbally communicating with people. My phone almost never rings to the point I have stopped carrying it around. I do communicate through email sometimes and now a days very few text messages. I know this sounds like a pity poor me party. And yes I am very aware the many, many people have it a lot worse then I do. But that doesn’t change my feelings. I think the bottom line I am trying to say is doing all that I try to do alone is really starting to really wear on me. I consider myself a very strong people. But there is only so much I can give without receiving emotional support. I feel as it my inbox is always over flowing and there is almost nothing in my outbox